truth and lies

I had a cool thing happen.Though this happens a lot, this one was almost exactly word for word what I was asking, it was kinda spooky!

I was looking at what is it that blocks me from seeing truth, and only seeing the lies? I am still stuck in the illusion (the lies) and they seem to be what is real to me.

I was looking at the specific example of seeing “evil/mean/bad” things, yet it is difficult for me to find “kind/compassionate” things. I mean for the real thing, not the phony stuff that people pretend is “nice” – I mean seeing real love, compassion, kindness.

That confused me because I don’t see “evil.. etc” as being real, either, yet I could see that.

I pondered this for about a day – specifically looking at my thoughts and how they tended to go in a “negative” road – thinking worry-like thoughts, I often feel grumpy and bored, I often don’t care to have people around because they bother me, I often have this underlying “anxiety”.

Then I was reading a book by Dean Koontz (mystery/thriller writer) and the “narrator” of the book said this: “She was always aware that terror, betrayal and cruelty had a human face, but she had not sufficiently appreciated that courage kindness and love had a human face as well.”

Haha – now that I write it a few days later, it doesn’t seem as profound as it did then!! Haha!

Anyway, at the time it was very profound. Maybe it was because it was 3am and I was reading a thriller, and that line seemed so out of context to the rest of the book. Why was that even in there? Yet, it seemed that it was exactly what I was pondering – like he knew I would see it just then!

And then I saw that both are lies … the “good” and the “bad” – and I have seen the lie in the “good”, and though I acknowledge seeing the lie in the “bad” I guess I haven’t had an experience of that lie yet. I have seen the “sugary-sweet” person as false/lie. But I cannot see that the “mean” person is a lie. I “believe” that is still real. I believe people are mean to me, that they have an intent to harm me, that they don’t like me.

The minute I can really see that it is a lie, it would all fall apart (or together : ))
I see that there is something “real” that is the same as the good here that is a lie, so maybe that makes the difference?

Maybe that is why I can see the “positive” things as a lie, yet not see the “negative” things as lies as well?

Onward on the journey … : )

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  • Lynn Everett-Purfield January 10, 2012 at 3:11 pm

    Hi Dona, just found your blog. This is great.
    Interesting pondering:) I looked at all this fairly deeply and asked questions about nature…..that which is natural underneath the psychological and conditioned mind. It seems obvious now, the in the nature of primates, and other animals, there is the natural (what some would consider positive or love) nurturing, protecting, caring, feeding, sourcing, grooming, for each other. It’s worth a look at and to determine how much of this is the actual behaviour of a more evolved consciousness? The opposites are there too. Both destructive and beneficial. It’s natural and not good or bad, just more beneficial. These seem to have been developed further into the psychological make-up, and go distorted by insecurity, need, manipulation etc.

    • Dona January 15, 2012 at 2:52 pm

      Yes Lynn. We are brought up to deny our “nature”, as we are conditioned/taught to think of it as “animalistic” (being “bad”). So, from the very beginning it is beaten out of us (sometimes literally).

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